| = opinion | Marius Surleac [05.Oct.08 10:42] |
| Hi Madalina! I like the intensity of your words and the imagery as well, though I have some questions: in the title you wanted to use "lens" instead of "less" or is just a mistake? Also I think that should be "No cold bound to bind us" instead of "Nothing cold bound to bond us". Then, I cannot understand well the next expression "the top of my nose broke lose gently" - I have the idea but, maybe would be more suitable to use "breaks, loses gently". Best wishes, Marius | |
| = . | nica mãdãlina [05.Oct.08 10:54] |
| in the title is lens, because of the final squint. i'll put bind instead of bond. but for the nose i'll keep the broked lose 'cause i wanted to suggest the lack of speed there, in contrast with the verbs themselves. thanks for stopping by | |
| = and... | nica mãdãlina [05.Oct.08 11:00] |
| broke, not broked, of course. not even broken:) | |
| = ! | Marius Surleac [05.Oct.08 10:59] |
| Yes, but that "nothing" doesn't look too well and also you can use the noun "loss" for that "broked" instead of the verb "lose". Cheers, Marius | |
| = a letter | nica mãdãlina [05.Oct.08 11:07] |
| let's laugh a bit! cause in fact it's loose... hahaha it makes sense now? hope so... | |