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Poezii Rom�nesti - Romanian Poetry

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Empty monolog
screenplay [ Theater ]
sing

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by [Wana ]

2008-01-05  |     | 



Sing- I’m trying to sing but the light is putting me away, crying, laughing, I’m trying to stay…
Thunder is coming across the roads of the broken city, I’m empty, and we’re all empty but so full. Smiling faces and a big thought, we’re all so sad, we’re trying to be cool. Death is just our reason to live and love is our road to death. Do we love? Does love exist?
Don’t answer! I’m trying to pretend it’s not raining but water makes me cold, so cold…
Not watching you is like a torture and looking into your eyes is a penalty, it’s prison, it’s my end, it’s my stupidity, it’s my nothing, it’s my all…
Sing, cry, smile, die… please don’t die when I die, please don’t laugh when I laugh because you’ll think it’s God’s fault, it isn't, I don’t believe in God. Don’t try, don’t even try to lie, I’ll go away without even saying “goodbye” because I don’t want to see your ugly face looking in the mirror. Do I love you?
Don’t answer! I’ll pretend it’s not what it is, I’ll pretend I've always been empty and shadows follow me beneath the path. The path, the way, the road… what are we looking for?
Be happy! Are you happy? You've always smiled when sunrises gave you green eyes looking at the beautiful spaces, beautiful buildings, beautiful cars, beautiful life, beautiful war…
Broken, it’s all broken, I've broken your eyes, your nose, your head, your breath, your hair, your neck, I could never brake your heart, I tried, I tortured myself but it’s so difficult to break it… do you have it?
Don’t answer! I’m trying to look for my other friend, I’ve lost him because of you, I’m lying now, that never happened, you didn’t steal my friends, you killed them, I hate my friends because you hate them, I’m lying, I never hated you…
I’m crawling, begging you, I hate the morning, I hate the days when I see you smiling because summer isn’t autumn anymore.
I can see bones, I can see flowers, I can see my dark, I can see you when I’m empty, you make me empty, you look so green, you look so full in your smiling… my eyes are bleeding, I’ve got to stop looking at you, I’ve got to stop smiling, I’ve got to go…
Something round, something so sharp, something so ugly but beautiful, hate me, please hate me, hate my eyes as much as I love yours, hate my ears, hate my neck, hate my books, don’t hate my thoughts, don’t look at me because I love you again and again and I need to smile, you won’t let me smile and I always cry writing about you… I’m lying, I never wanted to smile. Leave me alone, hug me, laugh about my stupidity, laugh because I need you to laugh, laugh when I cry, I’ll cry for your laughing days, I’m just another book in another library, in another city, in another country…
Give me colors, please color my soul, my heart, my dreams, my hands, my eyes… drink the coffee that comes from my blood, my mouth, my smile, kiss my coffee, drink me, smoke me, let me scream, let me smoke, I want to be your cigar but you don’t smoke and you’ll never smoke, I want to be your autumn, your winter, you hate my spring, you hate my summer, you’ll always look away, look above your black, your grey…
Bow, I want to bow but I can never see your eyes, green, so green… your green makes me black, my brown makes you hate my seasons, you hate my water, my air, my nothing, I’ve always looked for your everything, I found your water, you won’t let me look for your air, your thoughts, your dreams, I’m looking for the morning when you shave your beard… I’m lying, I saw your beard was never shaved.
I saw crows, I saw the sky, I never saw your sky, you never let me fly because you don’t know what crows mean to me, nobody knows my white, nobody knows our colors, do they know your green? I wish I could steal your blue but you’ve always had green and I didn’t see it, you’ve always had the everything from my brown, you hate every color that comes from inside me! Please, look away, close your eyes, stop your white, stop colors, please stop, please, please stop!
Stop running so slow, you’re slow in me, you’re fast in my mind, I hate my mind, liar! I’m sorry I lied, I never saw you slow in me, you were in someone, I’ll kill the shadow that kills me, kill me, you’ll kill me one day, you’ll kill my colors, you’ll make me white, I’m so black when I look into your nothing, drink my juice, my water, my coffee, hot chocolate, hot air, hot sun, hot ice in the summer eating winter. Let your autumn in my spring, let your dreams circle into a ring, begin like a dead king, begin with the end, let’s end our beginning, let’s draw colors, let’s put apples in front of our faces, let’s never eat apples, let’s never talk if apples are empty, the pigeon is full and your apple is so empty, so colorful, so green… but, your hat is missing, you’ve got a missing hat… I’m lying, you never had a hat, you were so cold like my raining day, I started to rain, I was your cloud, I’m not the sky, I’m your ground, I’m your carpet, you’ve always stepped on me, you’ve always spit on me, I was your nothing, I’m still your nothing and everything is in my color, my color loves your black, my white is in love with your green. Eat chocolate, eat the nothing in me, drink my coffee, my juice, my tea… I’m sorry, we all hate tea, I wish your tea is better than my dead grandfather buried near your emptiness.
I hate your history, I hate your pen, I hate your negative thoughts when I remember your jokes, you make me smile but I always wake up crying because I laughed, I hate laughing because you’re so white, you’re the smiling I need at 8 o’clock in the morning, you’re my last words at midnight…
Paintings, I see paintings, I see you, I see you in a painting, I see us never meeting, I’m looking into your eyes, I hate the way you ignore my eyes looking at your painting. I hate your eyes, I hate your lips, I hate your voice, I hate myself because I hate the way I felt in love with you, I’m lying… I never hated your lips, I love them so much, I wish I could touch in a second your whole life in our kiss, I wish I could hate you, I’m so empty…
Laugh, please laugh, I love your smile, I hate the weather, I hate the clouds, I hate your clouds… I’m lying, I never looked at your clouds the way you looked at me when I closed the door…

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