| = ! | Corina Gina Papouis [13.Dec.09 13:33] |
| your text needs a bit of de-cluttering for this poem would look beautiful when undressed of repetitions. last stanza priceless: 'Feel in her eyes March, September in her heart.' regards, Corina | |
| = !! | Corina Gina Papouis [13.Dec.09 13:35] |
| ...your poem does not include explicit language...you need to un-click that particular icon! OK?..:) | |
| = As Corina- | John Willy Kopperud [13.Dec.09 15:32] |
| - I certainly enjoyed the poem. One detail though; Break of THE day as a title does not seem quite appropriate to me. I'm convinced that the right way to express this in English is:THE BREAK OF DAY. Cheers from Willy | |